P.S.
You were and are loved.
To my baby who never got to breathe his or her first breath. To the baby I never held in my arms — this letter is for you.
My dear baby,
We never officially met, but you were still very much loved. I don’t understand why my body didn’t allow you to grow and be born, and I can’t simply say it “just wasn’t meant to be.” I don’t believe that. I’m not even sure what I believe — only that you had a purpose, and you still do. It just wasn’t lived out in my world.
When I found out you were growing within me, I felt everything at once — excitement, fear, wonder — and I fell in love with you immediately. Until the moment I lost you, I dreamed of holding you for the first time, counting all ten of your fingers and toes. I imagined your hair — straight or curly. I wondered if you’d be a boy or a girl. Would you have my eyes or your dad’s? I hoped you’d have my nose, and if you didn’t, I’d love you even more.
If you had come into this world, I would have protected you, nurtured you, and taught you through example.
But even without breath, you taught me.
You taught me how quickly love can grow. You taught me how deeply a heart can stretch. You taught me that motherhood begins long before a baby is placed in your arms.
There are days I still wonder who you would have become. There are days I still feel the echo of what could have been. And there are days — like today — when I feel you close, not as a memory, but as a quiet presence that shaped me in ways I’m still discovering.
I carried a whole world inside me, and the world never knew.
I want you to know this: your life mattered. Your existence mattered. Your brief time within me changed me.
You will always be part of my story — not as a shadow, but as a small, sacred light I carry with me.
Wherever you are — in God’s hands, in the universe’s keeping, in the mystery I may never understand — I hope you know this truth:
You were loved every moment you existed. You are loved still.
Love, Your mom
Author’s Note
This letter is a tender offering for anyone who has carried a life that never took a breath in this world. If you have walked through this kind of loss — quietly, privately, or without acknowledgment — I want you to know that your grief is real, your love is real, and your story deserves a place to rest.
You are not alone in the ache you’ve held. You are not wrong for remembering. You are not weak for still feeling it.
There is no timeline for healing, no “right way” to move forward, and no expiration date on the love you carry for a child you never got to meet. If this letter touched something tender within you, may it remind you that your motherhood is valid, your heart is sacred, and your story matters.
Until next time, don’t forget —
Love Life++ Hugs
Dawna‑Rae
🦋 may the butterflies remind you that we are all still becoming