Comforting others

Happy Sunday evening,

How is everyone doing tonight? The weekend is near over and another week is quickly approaching. I hope everyone enjoyed their weekend either with family, friends or with the quiet of being alone. Whatever your weekend looked like, I’d love to hear from you. Shoot me a text or drop me a comment, you still make my day when I get to hear your thoughts.

It’s been a busy couple of days full of excitement sprinkled with some big-time disappointment. I have been asking myself what my lesson is in having something taken away from me, something that seemed like it was mine, but then again, maybe it really wasn’t mine to begin with. Maybe it was only wishful thinking from the imperfections of being human.

One lesson I’ve learned over the last couple of days is, I need to take to heart when something seems off, even if it seems off with a family member or a friend. Not everyone has my best interests at heart.

I ran across this quote that helped put things into perspective regarding the ugliness my so-called friend did to me.

“The unhappy derive comfort from the misfortunes of others.”-Aesop/AZ Quotes.

While what happened to me is definitely a misfortune in my world of dreams, it’s not a misfortune in my overall well-being. What has potentially been taken from me was important to what I had pictured for my life, but it doesn’t define me or change who I am. I won’t let it.

It is unfortunate that someone whom I’ve cared about, helped and been a friend to, sabotaged me.

I had a long, long talk with God this morning on my walk and I told him I need his help desperately. I didn’t sleep very well last night. When I closed my eyes all I could see was a vision of what John and I have been working so hard to get, slip away. I woke up angry, hurt and disappointed, then I took the pups for an extra-long walk this morning and had the best heartfelt talk with my creator.

I realized I was becoming too self-consumed. I was thinking too much about what I don’t have instead of feeling gratitude for what I do have. I was allowing my thoughts last night to be consumed with disdain towards another human being. How can I possibly expect God to use me to do his will if I’m carrying judgement towards another person. Her transgression towards me isn’t mine to make right, it’s His.

I prayed to God and asked him first for forgiveness in having a bad thought towards someone. I then asked Him to help me move past the feeling of defeat, then I came home and began crafting while I listened to music. My heart felt calm and then I decided to message my friend. I invited her to do a little shopping with me. It was nice just being able to ask her advice on matters and what I took away from our chat was this. She reminded me of how private a person she is. She then told me to always use caution when it comes to sharing things about myself. This friend has been a big comfort through this difficult time. I only hope I can be as good a friend to her that she is to me.

As you all know, I’m a pretty open book. I’ve always felt I had nothing to hide, but I’ve learned otherwise. I’ve learned that being completely open to whomever, I allow room for hurt and pain to be inflicted upon me. I allow myself to be vulnerable to the cruelty of others, but I also allow myself to maybe help someone and make a difference in their life. I’m hopeful for the later, but now, I’m treading lightly because of the possibility of being hurt again.

No matter what trials and tribulations I have gone through, and believe me, I’ve gone through some duzzies, He has never left me. God has always been there. He’s guided me and He’s always given me an abundance of love and comfort. I receive these not only from Him, but from others.

God knows me. He knows John, and He knows you too. He comforts us and helps us comfort others.

Allowing my heart to be open to God comforting me will help me comfort others. The following quote helps shed light on this:

I woke up this morning with my light dimmed. John said he was fearful I was falling into a depression. I had closed the door to what else could be lying ahead for me. I had a friend tell me yesterday after reaching out to him to see if he could perhaps rescue what seems to be lost, and he reminded me of this, “Universe has a plan!” I completely agree.

I’ve worked so hard the last 8 years to become a whole person and not someone’s door mat. I’ve worked hard to embrace having my own ideas, thoughts and identity. I won’t allow others into my life who want to take this away from me. I know what it’s like to be a mindless shell, and it sucks! Reading the above quote shows us that we need to take care of ourselves. We need to allow ourselves to be comforted, after all, “it’s treason-an act of war against ourselves.”

We have enough of our own obstacles in life, we don’t need others to add to those. I’ve heard it said so many times over these past few days, “when you take a trip and go by plane, one of the first things the pilot tells his passengers is if we encounter an emergency and the oxygen masks come down, put mask on first before helping someone else.” This is the same when it comes to our own well-being, we cannot continuously take care of others if we aren’t taking care of ourselves.

My dear friends, please take care of yourself. It’s an honor and privilege when we can help comfort another human being, it truly is. It’s a wonderful act of service when we lend a hand to someone who needs it. When we do reach out to comfort another person, we need to make sure we are doing it from a place of love, compassion and understanding. We need a clear mindset to be completely there for others.

The best comfort comes from a full heart. We need to take comfort in what others say and do for us so we can return the same act of kindness towards them.

I’ll leave you on this wonderful Sunday evening with this final quote:

Comforting others brings me happiness and joy, but I cannot comfort others if I become a mindless shell by allowing a hurtful person to rob me of my dreams. Nobody can steal what we aspire to be. They cannot take from us our happiness. That’s on us.

So while my dream may have been diverted to a different path and though I feel a loss, as my friend said, “the Universe has a plan!”

And on that note, I’ll be saying goodnight. Sleep well and until next time, don’t forget, Love Life++ Hugs.