Will You See Me

Happy Monday,

How are you all doing? Let me say, Happy New Year to you all. I hope your Christmas and holiday season was as amazing as all of you. Things have been a bit crazy lately for me. I’ve been a little on the sick side of things and just can’t seem to kick it. I’m good for a couple of days, then I’m exhausted. I think the change in weather and just doing too much is catching up to me, or maybe, my depression is back a little and I just haven’t recognized it as of yet, either way, I am doing my best to keep to a schedule and routine.

I don’t have too much to report as far as new things happening. My friend Susan did come over last Wednesday and we spent the entire day, into the night sewing, talking and just hanging out. I think she would agree, it was our best sewing day yet. We both needed to just escape reality and dive into our shared passion of sewing. Susan brought over her Christmas pillow she made, and OM Goodness, it was so pretty. I have the fabric; pattern and I will soon be making mine.

I am trying to get back into my writing, not only of my blog but of my books. Yes, books. I have three currently I am working on. I love writing and today is dedicated to nothing but writing. I wanted to start out with my blog first, then I want to work on my books.

I thought today I would talk about how sometimes when we feel lost or in need of comfort it’s not always easy to convey to others what we need. Sometimes, we hope that the friendships we’ve formed are strong enough and deep enough that our friends will be able to “just know” when we need encouragement, or a listening ear. I hope too, that we are the type of people that can sense when someone we love or care about are in need of maybe just a phone call or a quick text, maybe even a card sent their way. I know, cards seem to be something old school, however, I personally love that form of communication, old school sending of cards or letters.

“I overheard a conversation the other day. He said, ‘but if you don’t let people know you are lost, how can they help you?’ She said, ‘because the help I need is found in the eyes of someone who sees I am lost. Who stops to notice I have gone, or my pace has slowed, or my smile is forced. If they can see those things, then they will know that I need caring, not help.”-Nausicaa Twila. I really like this, because it helps me appreciate that sometimes, people need to be cared for on a deeper level then maybe just helping them.

When we care for someone, we in some ways are looking after those unable to care for themselves. It’s a way of displaying kindness and concern for someone. It’s being there for them perhaps on an emotional level, whereas helping someone might be offering some sort of service or offering of resources. Both are needed at times, and we just need to be in tune to the difference and which one is appropriate for the circumstance.

I know there have been plenty of times that I’ve felt lost or displaced and I haven’t been able to express it because I myself don’t get what I’m feeling, I just know something is off. I’m so blessed to have someone like John in my life who knows me better then I know myself at times. He is so entuned to me that he can see a shift in my mood, or in my overall wellbeing, many times even before I feel off or recognize it. John sees me, even when I’m lost.

I know I titled this, will you see me, but it’s more than that. Will you see me? Will I see you? Do we see in the eyes of those we love and care about when they have a sense of feeling lost? Are we able to tap into that sense of knowing that someone needs us to care? Life seems so busy all the time. Technology has consumed so much of our lives, and it seems like we have less time to take a walk on the beach, explore life outside our front doors, enjoy the company of people who mean the world to us.

I’ve been lost, I’ve been in want of needing care, and I know you have needed care too. I know you’ve felt lost and alone, we all have, and I hope that when you find yourself at that point, I will see you, and if I’m there, maybe you’ll see me too.

I hope you all know how amazing you truly are. “She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes, or when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile even if she was sad. No, she wasn’t beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul.”-F. Scott Fitzgerald.

I hope to see you when you are in need of care and help and I hope you will see me too. We need each other, we need, especially in these crazy times of uncertainty, someone to feel or see our desperations, even if we don’t feel it in ourselves. John says all the time that being an empathetic person, he is able to tune into the feelings of those he loves and I guess you can say, he loves me a whole heck of a lot, since he at the most random times will call me and say, “I felt you needed to talk to me or hear my voice”, and I am being totally honest here when I say, he is right. I will put it out to the Universe that I am feeling a need to connect with him and within moments, I hear his voice, or he shows up or at the very least, I get a text message saying I love you and miss you. When we’re together, he’ll sometimes randomly come in and hug me and I get this sense of everything is okay now, and I, up to that moment didn’t realize things were off. I hope someday, I can be more like him.

I opened myself up this morning to the Universe by saying, I want to be able to see when someone I love is in need of being cared for and within an hour, I received a phone call from my brother who was having a bad day and I felt it was a gift from God that I could help him. He even told me how thankful he was that I picked up the phone and talked to him because he was in that much need to be cared for. He just needed someone to hear him and love him.

We are created in God’s image and God is love, so I believe, we need to work at being in the here and now and having an openness to see the good in people, rather than focusing on what may be presenting itself as bad. John and I have made it our goal this year to take a moment before responding and hopefully by doing this, we’ll speak less aggressively, show more kindness and understanding and my goal now is to hopefully be more entuned to someone needing care along with help. I can’t change the world, but I can change me. I want to be known as a kind, loving and giving person and when my time on earth is done, I want to be known as someone who gave it her all to make sure others knew how valuable they are.

Well guys, I have certainly missed you all, please drop me a comment, shoot me a text or message, I’d love to hear from you all. I look forward to writing more and getting your feedback, however, until next time, please don’t forget, Love Life++