Mother’s Day…

Happy Mother’s Day,

Here’s a big shout out to all you amazing and wonderful mom’s, step-up moms, mom’s to be, or whatever wonderful role you are blessed to play in the life of someone. I do hope you had the greatest of days and I hope more then anything you know how much you are valued, loved and appreciated. Happy Mother’s Day to all you beautiful women out there. Please send me a text or message and let me know how you were celebrated or who you celebrated. I love hearing from each and everyone of you.

I thought since today is Mother’s day I’d share a little bit of the history behind it. Anna Jarvis of Philadelphia, “whose mother had organized women’s groups to promote friendship and health, originated Mother’s Day. On May 12, 1907, she held a memorial service at her late mother’s church in Grafton, West Virginia. Within five years virtually every state was observing the day and in 1914, U.S. President Woodrow Wilson made it a national holiday. Over time the day expanded to include others, such as grandmothers and aunts, who played mothering roles.”-Britannica.com. Ms. Jarvis did try and abolish the holiday in the last years of her life because of how commercialized it had become.

As a mother of two amazing sons and two boys who I love as sons, I can tell you this, Mother’s Day isn’t about what you receive as far as gifts are concerned. While I am grateful and appreciative of the wonderful gifts I got, I will say, just hearing “I love you” from my boys meant the world to me. Being wished a happy Mother’s Day from Katie and Jagger, that touched my heart and the card that Grant and Tate got me, those will be the things I will cherish. John got me a card too and while he has yet to meet my boys, he tells me all the time what a wonderful mom I am. I wish he could of seen me when I was at my best and totally and completely immersed in motherhood. I do appreciate though, that he sees value in me, not only as his girlfriend, his partner, but as a mom. To have the man you love so much trust you with the hearts of his own flesh and blood, well, words cannot describe how that makes me feel.

I’ve only celebrated but a couple of Mother’s Day’s, but this one was extra special. This was the first year I was acknowledged by my sons and my daughter in law. Jagger has acknowledged me for the last couple of years and I can’t tell you just how much that girl has captured my heart. I know some of you may be wondering why this year was the first year I was acknowledged by my boys? Sadly, I raised them in a religion that didn’t allow for celebrating Mother’s Day, or any holiday for that matter. I left the religion about five years ago and what a burden has been taken off my shoulders. For as long as I can remember, I wanted to always tell those in my life who were role models, Happy Mother’s Day, Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I can do that now and I’m not looking back. It’s the greatest feeling being free and being able to share in all these wonderful and exciting days.

Mother’s Day and all the other holidays to me, isn’t about what I can get you or what you get me, it’s about spending time together, it’s about showing you how much you mean to me. It’s about being together and enjoying each other’s company. It’s about family and friends. It felt so good this morning waking up and sending all my mama friends a Happy Mother’s Day. John’s birthday is this week and I’m super excited to take him out for a wonderful dinner with our friends. I’m excited to be able to spend next weekend with his family celebrating the man I love. I’m excited to be able to just tell those in my life how much I love them and how much they mean to me, especially on their very special days.

Today, on this very special Mother’s Day, I was able to reflect on my sons and the life we’ve shared. They are both grown now, but they are so beyond amazing and they melt my heart in every way. I am grateful that God gave me the gift of motherhood. Psalms 127:3, “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” I don’t know what I could of possibly of done right in God’s eyes, but he has blessed me with two sons of my own and two sons that I am not a mother of, but a mother to. Both roles play such an important role in this life. To have two sons who I carried beneath my heart for nine months and to have them born healthy and to grow up into two of the most amazing men I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing, all I can say is, God had a hand in the way they were raised and he guided my path in raising them. The day Tommy was born and I held him in my arms, I never wanted to let him go. The hardest thing I ever did was give him the gift of soaring into this world and ironically, the day he walked me down the isle at his own wedding, was the day he went from being my little boy to Katie’s husband. My son was a man who no longer needed his mom. He was now becoming the husband to the girl of our dreams. Walking down the isle with my son, for me was, a stroll down memory lane. My role was changing in those steps we took together, my arms wrapped tightly around his. Those few moments as we walked, we shared a few last words before he took on the role of husband. I told him how much I loved him and how proud I was of him.

As I sat there, just feet away from him, I couldn’t help but reflect on his life. He had a rough time coming into this world, but I would talk to him everyday while he was fighting for his life within my belly. I told him I couldn’t fight this fight alone, he had to fight too and that’s just what my boy did. I’ll never forget holding him in my arms and thanking God for this gift, my son. I never thought I could love anything or anyone as much as I loved Tommy, that is, until Kevin came along. It’s amazing how God gives a mother a heart that can hold love for another child. I never understood how it could even be possible to love another child as much as I loved my first, but when Kevin came to be, he too had to fight to live. Tommy used to talk to my belly everyday along side me and together we’d tell his baby brother we couldn’t fight this fight alone, we needed him to fight too and that’s just what he did. Kevin blessed our lives and my heart with more love then I ever thought possible.

Today I thank my God for Tommy and Kevin. I never understood unconditional love until they were born. There is nothing in this world my boys could do to change my love for them. God has put two more sons in my life, Grant and Tate. While I am not their mom, they have a mom of their own, I can be a mom to them when they are with John and I. Grant is John’s mini-me and he has a heart of gold. He loves with his whole heart. He’s a wonderful young man that I am grateful to watch grow up. Tate is more complicated, he’s still a baby in my eyes. Only nine years old and he loves his mom so deeply that sometimes I think he pushes me away because he doesn’t want to hurt her. That’s okay though, I’m glad he loves his mama and wants time with her. I hope she realizes just how lucky she is to have two amazing and wonderful sons. I know I do.

Today is Mother’s Day. Today is a day that I celebrate being a mom to two of my own sons and a step in mom to John’s two sons. Four boys between us. I wouldn’t have it any other way. For today, I’ll to pretend that I am mom to four sons and my love for each of them is the same. It doesn’t matter who came out of my tummy and who didn’t, I get to be mom to them all, for three of them, I get to be mom all the time and for one, I get to be mom when he’s here. I am honored and blessed.

To Tommy and Kevin, you are my sons. Two men stand now where my baby use to be, and the sight of you both, all grown up moves me. My sons, you have become wiser and stronger men then I ever dreamed you could be, but I know when I look at you, God has blessed me in ways that years ago I never would have believed. You are adults in this world and that is how it should be, but in my heart and soul, you both will always be, my baby boys. I love you. To Grant and Tate. “I didn’t give you the gift of life, but in my heart I know, the love I feel is deep and real, as if it had been so. For us to have each other is like a dream come true! No, I didn’t give you the gift of life, life game me the gift of you.”-unknown.

Well everyone, thank you for taking time out of your day to read the blog. I do hope whatever you did today, I hope it was a happy day. Please send me your comments, I love hearing from you all. Happy Mother’s Day and don’t forget, Love Live++